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Archive for the ‘disgust’ Category

Sloane’s Ice Cream Parlor Novelties         

At the San Diego UTC Mall, there’s an ice cream store called Sloane’s Ice Cream Parlor.  They have the most interesting novelties. They include comical solutions to life’s most complex problems including how to understand your mother, enjoy exercising, talk to your cat, etc.


And then there are the socks.” I love my job ha ha, just kidding”, “I hate everyone,” and others.There’s fake dog poop that’s a spare key hiding spot, the crazy cat lady action figure, which comes with 6 plastic cats,

Of course,there’s also that good old fashioned random bag of crap.  As crazy as these things are, I imagine they come with a pretty high price tag. After all, the La Jolla UTC is not cheap. Sloane’s ice cream is very high quality, and so are these laughs, so if you’re looking for unique gag gifts, this is the place to go.

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Nose Candy @ Point Loma AM/PM

I went to a seedy AM/PM in Point Loma, a seaside area of San Diego that has both rich & poor people. The cellphone photo is not the best because it was taken at night but I saw this poster for some kind of weird wax toy that has a straw coming out of colored noses.    Apparently, the child who plays with this toy is supposed to pick which color nose he/she wants to suck their drink out of. Lovely.   20160619_220940

“Naked Skydiving” Banned From Barnes & Noble

ignoble2My book “Naked Skydiving” was banned from the Mira Mesa Barnes & IgNoble tonight.  Ironically, the book was  published by Barnes & Noble but they won’t hold a book signing for books published by iuniverse, Barnes & Noble’s brand of print on demand publishing, that I signed with.

Some of you may disagree with what I did, but I unintentionally walked into the store during another author’s  book signing that asked people in the audience to tell stories about their dating life. So I raised my hand and was called upon. I started tell people about my dating life and my book, “Naked Skydiving” that has dating scenes in it from a male perspective. My girlfriend encouraged me to tell people about the book, so  I asked permission from the authors to see if they wanted me to get  a few copies out of the car and show it to them and they said “Yes” in front of their audience. So I brought the books in to show it to them.  I said I didn’t want to steal their thunder but can I show you a copy? One of the authors looked at me like she wanted me to leave the book on the table so she could read it later, which I did.

After the storytelling and question and answer period was over, I realized that photographers  were taking pictures of the authors during their book signing and my book was still on the table.  So much the better, I thought.  But after a while, I noticed the book was missing. I wondered where it went so I asked the community manager in charge of book signings where my book was.  She indicated that perhaps they kept it as a gift.  I thought about the fact that this might promote it in some way, and decided to let them keep it.  Then I offered the manager  a free copy. She said they were having an author’s night soon and she’d read it to see if she wanted to include it.  I exchanged contact information with her and started writing my contact information to leave for the authors too.

Apparently, all of their encouragement, like much in life was phony. While I was jotting it down,  a man came up and rudely said he was the store manager. He said that he took my book and put it in his briefcase.  He wondered why I was writing notes and he was very angry about it. I told him I was just leaving my info to the authors so they could get in touch with me if they wanted to.  He said  I was bothering several people making them uncomfortable because this was their event and not mine.  I told him I understood where he was coming from, and that I asked permission every step of the way and they said “Yes.”  He said he would give the book to the authors with my contact info, but he wanted me to leave.  I said if you’re going to throw the book out, I want it back.  He agreed to give “Naked Skydiving” and my contact info to the authors. I didn’t want any trouble but he was very agitated so I started to leave and  I nervously left one of my books on a shelf by accident. He accused me of trying to further promote my book because a copy was still on the shelf and told me to “get the fuck out of here before it gets worse.”  He gave me all of the copies of my book back with my contact info.  I had to find my girlfriend and leave. She was somewhere in the store so after being escorted out by the community manager, I called her and only got her voicemail.  I had her paged so we could go. I told her the story since she wasn’t present when he accosted me. For these reasons and the fact that Barnes and Noble overcharges iuniverse authors for their own books when they buy them in the store, I strongly urge you to BOYCOTT BARNES & NOBLE and get you’re copy of “Naked Skydiving” from my @square online store now, or if you see me around town in San Diego, I’ll sign a copy for you. Shop online or at an independent bookstore instead. You’ll be treated better.

I didn’t mean to upstage the authors or horn in on their action. I asked for consent every step of the way. Apparently, their consent was insincere. And they are so afraid of sharing the spotlight, that they had to throw me out. Perhaps they feared my book would sell more than the one being signed.

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Watch “Ebola | Parody of The Kinks’ “Lola” | ZDoggMD.com” on YouTube

My Friend Was In Trayvon Martin’s Shoes

One afternoon, my friend told me he was walking around the corner to the liquor store near his home in Venice beach to get an ice cream.  Another man started walking in front of him.  Being that this was near Muscle Beach, the man who walked in front of him was ripped like a bodybuilder.  A very big muscular dude, compared to my friend, an intellelectual.

They were both going in the same direction. The muscle man heard my friend’s footsteps behind him.  He stopped and asked my friend, “Are you following me?”  My friend half smiled and said no, but before he could complete his sentence, the muscle man had decked my friend and pummled him on the ground.  He was in fear for his life. He actually believed it was the end for him.  He screamed as much as he could. Then, out of apathetic annoyance, a neighbor yelled “Keep it down out there!” This was while my friend was being beaten to death.  The muscle man ran away before he could be identified.

My friend called me, drastically explaining that I needed to take him to the hospital.  His cheeks were purple and swollen and he said his neck hurt like hell.  He couldn’t afford insurance, so I had to take him to a low-income  clinic. The doctor said the swelling would go down after a while and no bones were broken,so he was Okay and healed up a few weeks later.  I asked him if he would have shot the guy if he had a gun.  My friend, was a spiritual antiwar activist type so even though he was terrified, he still said no.

Trayvon didn’t have a gun either.  Fear of the unknown in both cases drove people’s actions more than race, but fear of an unknown black person in Zimmerman’s neighborhood lead him to kill instead of question.

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Britney Spears Almost Gets Poisoned At The Oscars Dream

I dreamed last night that I was with a female friend and we were at the Oscars. We met Britney Spears who liked me, so the three of us were all hanging out together and the female friend was jealous so she baked some muffins and put poison in Britney’s muffin. Britney tasted it and said she didn’t like it, but she was OKay. Then she asked me to go for a ride in her car so we went cruising together. The dream ended. Perhaps this dream is about the good and the bad and the shadow within myself, as Jung calls it.

Oscar Dream

Oscar Dream

Is This Really Britney At The Oscars
Or Just In My Dreams?

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