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Israel Is Surreal

Floating In The Dead Sea

Flying to Israel. On American ice leaked out of the air vent holes above my seat.  Had to shlep a lot to get to the Israeli terminal. Then the security interrogation.  I passed. Then dinner: Oye, somebody ordered the stinky fish. You could smell it throughout the whole plane. It took them a half an hour to remove my tray. And there was very little water so I choked a bit. I called the attendant and no one showed up even after ringing the buzzer 3 times.   Watched an independent Israeli movie about “Noise”.  Great idea as he confronts the noisy neighbors all around him.  Beautiful blonde hairdresser lays down next to me. Great tits” Got her number for a “haircut” too.

Maybe she’ll do my hair next Ah, the stuff I live for. This 15 hr flight takes forever!   Said my prayers away from the rabbis.

Finally rough landed in Tel Aviv and said goodbye to her since she lives near Galilee and I was headed on a plane to Eilat. Should have asked her to come with me since she thought Eilat was a lot of fun. But I didn’t and didn’t realize what it took to get there.  I picked up my bags and asked information for the way to Eilat.  They said that I had to go to another airport and take a taxi there. I did that and got a bad impression that Tel Aviv was run down. The cab ride ended up at this really funky little airport that resembled a bus station.  There was a reason for that because you had to take a bus to the plane.  The airline was called Israir.  It was a nice little plane, seemed well organized.  Had saxophone music constantly playing until take off. I wanted to fly before dark but that didn’t seem likely. It was one of those planes where you have to walk  some rickety steps to get on.  After the smoothest take off, we were in the air over the intricate lights of Eilat at night. The were unique, like some kind of  necklace.  A young brunette girl in her 20’s slept next to me the whole time but didn’t pay much attention to me. We landed, smooth as a baby’s tochass and I was told taxis are the way to get around here. So I caught one easily. I told the driver the name of my hotel and he drove me there, but when I entered the building, it looked like they were still working on it and a man told me it was closed! Don’t tell me that I had flown half way around the world to stay at a closed hotel! He immediately corrected himself and said I was to stay at the hotel across the street called the Astral Palma for the night.      Also dreamed that I would not be able to have an escort here, but somewhere else. Dreamed I had a massive erection a couple of times after masturbating. Due to my rupture or prostate or something else. Forgot what. Felt better that I have in awhile. Nice blue lit hotel. Fancy chocolates. In the morning, they told me that I had to check out because I was part of the tour so I had to stay at the hotel that I originally arrived at called  the Astral Village hotel  and now it was ready. Frustrated, I wheeled my bags over there and put them in my new room, which I have to admit, wasn’t as nice.  It looked old and I found out after awhile it didn’t have any WiFi. That’s a huge bummer for me.  You had to go to the lobby to connect. The pool I passed on the way to the room was beautiful, but few people swam in it because it was winter.

After a brief rest, I went to the group welcome, which was in the hotel lobby.  I met the leader of our group, Tamar, who was an Israeli ginger woman that hugged me right away. It felt nice. Then were on our own for awhile.   Pretty soon it was dinner time and I found out the group had grown from 5 people to 30 people.  I got my food which was a delicious buffet. The chicken and potato kinish were the best items, along with the halavah.  I struggled to find a way to sit down and was welcomed. However, I realized that not many people liked to speak English as most of them were speaking Hebrew. Oh sure, they asked me where I was from and why I was here, in English but beyond that they were all content to speak Hebrew and leave me mostly out of the conversation. I ate my dinner with a wall of Hebrew words between us. When you travel to a foreign country, you must accept this. People here in America say that people speak English all around the world, but mostly to help you. Not to really socialize with you. So they won’t explain what they are laughing about or upset about.  Anyway the food was good, so I said goodbye to them and retired to my room and TV.  I woke up and talked to a few guys who spoke English from Tel Aviv.  He asked me why I was here and I told him my parents lived here now, which they do.  And he asked me if I had children.  I told him I didn’t. And he asked me if I thought that something was missing from my life because I don’t, I told him that I do in some ways, but in other ways I don’t. Because I have less responsibility, peace and quiet and time to do my writing like this. He asked me why I didn’t have any kids and I told him that I didn’t meet my girlfriend till I was older. He said he didn’t believe me and that he thought I was handsome. I thought at that point that he was gay. And started to decide not to get too close, just in case he was hitting on me.  But he was already traveling with another guy so I figured I was not for him.   When I told everyone that I was from San Diego, they all got excited and one woman said she always wanted to go there.  She was not bad looking, but kinda portly. I became interested. She was younger than my girlfriend and could possibly have a kid with me. I began scheming a way to have her come to the states to be with me.  She complained that she hated it here, and the only thing good about living in Israel was the healthcare.  It was the opposite of the United States in that respect.  Next morning, I woke up and went down to breakfast and saw about the same faces.  I tried to sit next to her and talk to her, but she was talking to her more attractive sister in Hebrew so I really couldn’t get a word in edgewise. Remember overseas, anyone who speaks English or your language immediately becomes your best friend.  I met a few others at the table there, but I had my heart set on her or her sister, who never spoke one word to me.  I ended up eating some spicy thing by accident that gave me a terribly, painful  hemorrhoid which felt like razor blades up my ass. If you’ve never had one, it is the worst. I purposely left my hemorrhoid cream at home so it wouldn’t explode on the plane and now I was paying the price for it. Ouch!   So, I went to the local store to find a replacement product.  I asked the store clerk for preparation H.  And they  looked at me like I was crazy.  They didn’t know what it was.  So I tried to explain it to the clerk and they said they didn’t have any.  So I went down the aisles to check for myself.  The only thing I could find was some dead sea butt wipes for babies . I took them to the counter and a woman that worked there, told me that she gets hemorrhoids too sometimes and she can’t even walk then.  She said when she had that, she took a garlic clove and inserted it into her rectum overnight and she never had that  problem again.  While she was telling me this story, she lead me to the garlic in the produce aisle.

I told her I didn’t think this was for me and left with the Dead Sea butt wipes instead.  However, I was very curious to see what people said about this online.        Salt   &garlic

The next day we all walked to the yacht we were scheduled to sail on in Eilat.  Here are some pictures of it.

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As I understand it, the Mexican Day of the  Dead, is a holiday that lets people visit with their deceased relatives and it has a sense of humor about it. People bring their dead relatives their favorite food & drink. They are depicted doing many fun things like enjoying music and weddings. Because of it’s proximity to Mexico, Old Town San Diego celebrates the Day of the Dead every year in many of its’ shops & public squares.

The Wagonmaster of Death

Frida Kahlo’s Skeleton Paints A Self Portrait

Colorful, Even in Death

Two Skeleton Senioritas Near the Coyote Cafe

Edgar Allen Poe

I got an invitation to the Kate Ashton gallery last Saturday night, near El Cajon Blvd.  What a great Poe party & gallery!

A fantastic impressionistic portrait of Poe

They served punch with ice eyeballs in it. Here’s my drink.

Quothe the raven Nevermore!

Here’s an artist painting a tropical Poe scene, quothe the toucan, nevermore!

A few abstract, multicolored Poe inspired pics.

I visited the Poway Performing Arts Center recently during the day when only the office was open. The theater features some of the biggest acts in entertainment visiting San Diego including Kenny Rodgers,Clint Black, The Fabulous Thunderbirds, and many theatrical productions.

Here’s the box office window.

Local abstract art is also sold in the theater lobby.

The Poway Performing Arts Center is located @ 15498 Espola Rd, Poway, CA 92064. Their phone number is (858)-668-4693.

At the San Diego UTC Mall, there’s an ice cream store called Sloane’s Ice Cream Parlor.  They have the most interesting novelties. They include comical solutions to life’s most complex problems including how to understand your mother, enjoy exercising, talk to your cat, etc.


And then there are the socks.” I love my job ha ha, just kidding”, “I hate everyone,” and others.There’s fake dog poop that’s a spare key hiding spot, the crazy cat lady action figure, which comes with 6 plastic cats,

Of course,there’s also that good old fashioned random bag of crap.  As crazy as these things are, I imagine they come with a pretty high price tag. After all, the La Jolla UTC is not cheap. Sloane’s ice cream is very high quality, and so are these laughs, so if you’re looking for unique gag gifts, this is the place to go.

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After closing the sale of my parents home in Oceanside,  unfortunately, my Dad fell down and ended up in the La Jolla VA hospital at the escrow office.  A beautiful sweet woman in the parking lot saw it happen, helped me lift him up and gave him some bandages. She really reaffirmed my faith in human nature.

Afterwards, we went to visit him at the hospital.  Then, my date & I went to La Jolla shores for dinner.  We saw this restaurant  called Barbarella that was decorated thoroughly with these scary animated Halloween characters. In fact, it was so scary that my date didn’t want to eat there because of the giant fake spiders, even if they were near a romantic fireplace.

Since my “Day of the Dead” pictures from a few years ago became my most popular blog, I figured that I should share some of these fun early resHalloween  images as well.  My Dad is feeling better now too.

More Stunning Casa Mira Views

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Incredible sunsets from Casa Mira View’s Rooftop Jacuzzi

Below, you can stroll or drive by the side of the apartment complex and see fantastic modern sculptures by San Francisco artist, Damon Hyldreth.

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Other modern art is featured though out the complex and there are quite a lot of solar panels on the roof and electric car chargers. Some of the chargers are open to the public for a fee and others are private. They also have a party room for karaoke, an indoor fluorescent bowling alley, and food trucks stop by frequently.

At the beautiful pool,  they  show movies at night that are mostly family oriented. There’s even a merry go round and a choo choo train for little kiddies, and for big kiddies a massive gym called the high voltage fitness center.

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Casa Mira View Fire Fountain

Here in Mira Mesa, in Northern San Diego, CA, a fairly new apartment complex features an unusual fountain that appears to be the marriage of fire and water. Although usually a fountain with recycled water or oil, once in a while the gas jets light up on the side and you can see the fire like it is in the video.  The apartment also features other fantastic modern art which I will be blogging about here soon.

As part of my promised lost cause to blog about my last vacation to Sedona, Arizona, and surrounding areas, our bus tour took us to Seligman, Arizona on Route 66. In front of this Harley Davidson store, I found Joe Clark, singing memorably about his hometown, along Interstate Route 66, where mannequins and womennequins lined the streets. He’s a great musician so that if you are on a break from work and need to relax,  listen to him play.

Yoga Surfing In Coronado

While eating Hawaiian “pupus”at Peohe’s on the Coronado ferry landing, after writing a real estate offer on the “island,” I got these poetic shots of surfers, doing yoga on their paddle boards. It has been said that photography is all about capturing the moment.  These are some of my moments. 

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